Task 2

　　The tendency to copy is shown in the popularity of fashion in clothes and other consumers' goods. To what extend do you agree or disagree?’

As people’s People’s aesthetic demands have been growing with the development of the fashion industry. No issue seems to be more marvelous than fashion . Fashion It has long been an important part in modern life and it is so common in my country many countries for young people to follow some fashion trends in clothes, accessories, mobile phones, and even lifestyles like travelling abroad to enjoy the picturesque and exotic landscapes. The most evident example is the apple’s are Apple’s gadgets which are so sought after that fans of the digital giant send their tributes to it in a fanatical way.

In the first place, there would be better understanding about this phenomenon if the driving factors are scrutinized. The young generation is always the fashion followers who are eager to win recognition from their communities community , and the way of achieving that includes looking like a huge celebrity or a successful tycoon. Therefore imitating the clothing style of celebrities becomes sought after. This tendency is also further enhanced by glaring and dynamic advertisements in various forms. Rich and shiny stars endorse many products and enthusiastic fans support them by making a generous purchase. But since when has all this materialistic lifestyle started? Are the celebrities the fashion setters ?’ If we agree, it would be ridiculous. Without the abundant consumer goods in modern society, there would not have been so many forms of entertainments or fashions entertainment or fashion . Therefore, the real fashion setters should be the high production efficiency which encourages people to pursue luxuries. Fashion trend as an effective marketing strategy has to be dynamic, otherwise there would be less demand for mass production.

In addition to the previous point, regardless of the high popularity of some consumer goods or world known renowned brands, some mature minded people show no tendency of copying popular fashion styles. They have developed their own personal tastes for clothes and other consumer commodities and their preference tends to be less precarious. Furthermore, they are realistic and are more likely to make reasonable and sagacious decisions when shopping compared to than youngsters.

In conclusion, I believe that young people are prone to copy popular fashion trends in many aspects of their lives life due to the ample supply of consumer goods and the promotion of advertisements, while still there are some mature people holding their personal ways of life and ignoring the vogue vanity. In that case, the preponderance of the judicious consumers are just follow following their internal desires to make a choice but not to follow the superficial fad. Thus the tendency for human beings to copy one another cannot be shown in the popularity of fashion in clothes and other consumer goods.

Task Response: 7
Coherence and Cohesion: 7
Lexical Resource: 6
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 6

Hi. Your composition earns an estimated score of 6.5. Generally speaking, you were able to adequately satisfy the requirement of the task. I like the way you construct your introduction and conclusion. Use more appropriate words to describe your points. Be more specific to avoid confusing thoughts to the reader. The word “their” is usually followed with the plural form.

Don’t give up! You can do better next time. 

--murphy

Edited Version:

People’s aesthetic demands have been growing with the development of the fashion industry. No issue seems to be more marvelous than fashion. It has long been an important part in modern life and it is so common in many countries for young people to follow some fashion trends in clothes, accessories, mobile phones, and even lifestyles like travelling abroad to enjoy the picturesque and exotic landscapes. The most evident example are Apple’s gadgets which are so sought after that fans of the digital giant send their tributes to it in a fanatical way.

In the first place, there would be better understanding about this phenomenon if the driving factors are scrutinized. The young generation is always the fashion followers who are eager to win recognition from their communities, and the way of achieving that includes looking like a huge celebrity or a successful tycoon. Therefore imitating the clothing style of celebrities becomes sought after. This tendency is also further enhanced by glaring and dynamic advertisements in various forms. Rich and shiny stars endorse many products and enthusiastic fans support them by making a generous purchase. But since when has all this materialistic lifestyle started? Are the celebrities the fashion setters? If we agree, it would be ridiculous. Without the abundant consumer goods in modern society, there would not have been so many forms of entertainment or fashion. Therefore, the real fashion setters should be the high production efficiency which encourages people to pursue luxuries. Fashion trend as an effective marketing strategy has to be dynamic, otherwise there would be less demand for mass production.

In addition to the previous point, regardless of the high popularity of some consumer goods or world renowned brands, some mature minded people show no tendency of copying popular fashion styles. They have developed their own personal tastes for clothes and other consumer commodities and their preference tends to be less precarious. Furthermore, they are realistic and are more likely to make reasonable and sagacious decisions when shopping compared to youngsters.

In conclusion, I believe that young people are prone to copy popular fashion trends in many aspects of their lives due to the ample supply of consumer goods and the promotion of advertisements, while still there are some mature people holding their personal ways of life and ignoring the vogue vanity. In that case, the preponderance of the judicious consumers are just following their internal desires to make a choice but not to follow the superficial fad. Thus the tendency for human beings to copy one another cannot be shown in the popularity of fashion in clothes and other consumer goods.